In the battle to define
what is the
Step 1: Do NOT ask her to go to your place, and do NOT ask to go to hers.
That's immediate red flag for "this guy just wants sex." No matter how you try to spin it, women are not fooled by this. Any woman that is must be naive, or will wise up soon and you could pay for it later.
Step 2: Ask her to do something casual, like coffee or a drink.
The trick here is to relieve your pressure and hers by not asking it like it's "a date." Most women today date men they have some familiarity with beforehand, so if you don't know her incredibly well, start getting to know her.
If you work together, during a conversation, you could say "I'm going to lunch at ________. You wanna come along?"
If you have class together, you could say, "I"m going get a coffee. Can I get you one?" This works best if the coffee shop is on campus or within a short walking distance.
Step 3: What if she says no? Shrug it off.
Not every woman will say yes. And some women will say no initially, but then REGRET it later. Let a week pass, and make another similar effort.
You could say "Man you missed out last week, when I went to that new spot. I gotta get back out there today.) Then ASK HER AND SOMEONE ELSE TO JOIN YOU. This works exceptionally well if the other person you asked is ANOTHER WOMAN.
Why does this work? Because initially she thought you were asking her to lunch because you wanted "her." Now that you've asked someone else and you've been talking about how great the place was, you've made her wonder "Wait, why isn't this about me?" and "Maybe the place really is that good."
Once you've got her thinking both of these things, she'll more easily say yes.
As much as women hate to admit it, we like being WANTED. Any indication that we might not be wanted, piques our interest, at the beginning.
Because if we're not the center of your everything, we realize you're a strong and confident man who may be interested in us, but doesn't rely on us to keep his whole life together. That means you're a safe place to connect.
Now it's DATE time...
After you guys have lunch or coffee together, go for the date, and make it a REAL DATE, with dinner, a walk , or some other chance to show her a relaxing night out with a gentleman.
If she says no, once again, don't sweat it. She's not the only woman that'll be for you. Also, she may come around later. Just step back and chill, and give her a chance to show you some attention to get you back interested. If she doesn't, move on to someone else.
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Author: Jessica Bordelon
Passionate, powerful, & gentle, she is an artist that captures the strength , power & energy of femininity in its purest form.