In the battle to define
what is the
This world can be confusing enough without us adding to it.
Take a listen to how we can end some of these "mixed messages" and "double standards"
And Gentlemen, I'm here to solve some of the confusion. That's why I wrote the handbook to the female mind:
"How to Make a Modern Woman Act Like a Traditional lady."
Get yours today at the Store Tab & learn the secrets of women, from a woman.
When and when not to break up.
Modern Traditional Lady breaks down what's really worth breaking up and when to stay.
Having a rough time with your love? Get the handbook today, and get the secrets of the female mind.
Go to the store tab: $5.00 paperback & $3.00 Ebook.
You do not want to be in a "fairy tale" type of love. And here's the reason why.
4 minutes of awesome.
This is for the ones who say "I'm too busy for a relationship."
Here's to yall.
I used to say the same thing, but I've learned what we said here.
Min 3:00 is really going to hit you.
The poet who put it in a poem: the highs and beauties of having a love like this.
Taalam Acey is a man with experience, and he speaks here about the lessons he learned in love, and how to get it right.
After you feel this piece, scroll UP to the STORE tab, and get the ROAD MAP to the love he's talking about here.
"How to Make a Modern Woman Act Like a Traditional Lady."
It's Sunday every where today as I'm writing this. In some places it's just as sunny as it is here in my city. For others of you, it's storming. No matter what the weather is outside, YOU can set the mood of your weather by doing this:
With or without the kids. With or without a back yard, here's what you can do today to have some REAL fun.
WITHOUT THE KIDS IDEAS
SUNNY DAY - If it's sunny outside try these ideas
If you have no kids or if you have a day without the kids, get some washable markers, lay outside is as little clothing as you can get away with without getting arrested (unless you're into that sort of thing) Sip on margaritas, play and draw on each other.
Chances are this will get way past PG 13 and R rated territory, BUT the build up makes it all the more exciting. Some guys say, "Well if it's gonna get past R rated, let's just take it there without all the preliminaries" *I'm giving you the side eye look right now* Because if you wonder why your woman is less than thrilled to have play time with you, it's because you don't enjoy making it creative. You want her to make it awesome for you? Then make it awesome for her.
Fix those margaritas, go sit outside, and draw and kiss your way to heaven at home.
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RAINY DAY - You guys can't use the markers unless you wanna look like runny messes of ink. But you can still strip down since most likely the rain isn't making it too cold for swimwear anyway.
So get into as little clothing as you can comfortably risk in your backyard or home, and play a game of TOUCH football. Don't have a foot ball??? Make one out of rolled up tshirts!!!
Remember how playfighting and lightly pushing was the way to flirt for many years? Some couples stop that playfulness once they get comfortable. This activity is a sure way to get the playfulness back and to REAP THE REWARDS in major ways.
DON'T HAVE A BACK YARD? Well just wear tshirts and shorts, and head out to the park on a blanket. Once things get "heated" in an emotionally fun way, just rush back home for the "after party."
IF YOU'VE GOT THE KIDS TODAY, HERE'S THE FIX
Do the Sunny Day idea in the comfort of whatever area you can get away with it without intrusion of the little ones. If they are really small, get them in front of a movie with all the snacks they could ever want, and enjoy this time with just the 2 of you for a change.
It's NOT wrong at all to come back to center and re-energize your relationship. After all, YOU TWO are the CENTER of this family, and the kids are the branches. If the core isn't healthy, how can the branches be?
"I know you did not just act like you didn't hear me!"
"So you just gonna walk away and not say nothing?"
"OOOOh I hate you right now!"
When love gets hot & life gets heated to temperatures way above safe levels, we can sometimes take it out on the person closest to us. Even the best among us have done this a few times, & later regretted it. So what do you do when the anger flares up & you've said things you had no business saying?
Here's what you do:
Walk away. Remember that was the anger speaking, and not the love. DO NOT FALL for that mess some people say: "Well if you didn't mean it you wouldn't say it"
That's a load of dog poop on a sidewalk.
Don't step in it unless you want to stink for the rest of the day.
We all know people say things they don't really mean at times. When we get angry, our goal may be to unleash some of it. We can do that in hurtful ways
OR WE CAN LEARN A BETTER WAY... TOGETHER
So let's say yall are really going through it right now, or soon in the future. Before the next incident, the two of you need to do the steps to STOP the FIRE: stop drop and roll
Whatever the conversation is that has one or both of you heated, STOP it now.
Drop whatever you are doing, and both of you go do something that relieves stress: boxing gym, walking, running, salon treatment, pedicure, working oiut.
Roll both of your cooled off selves back together and remember
You will not always agree on everything, and that's normal and there is nothing wrong with that, at all. Just like Rick Warren, the pastor, said, it's a lie that we've bought that we have to always agree to love someone. Love is being there for each other as we are.
Love is remaining, seeking to uplift, and when arguments go down, remembering that we are all individuals, and we are all gonna have stress, and we
are ALL gonna make mistakes.
Together you face responsibilities and challenges as a team, and just like football players get mad sometimes with each other on the field, take that mess off the field, COOL OFF and get back in this together.
It's the ONLY way to win.
Some of yall are saying, "Can't I just do a trade like in the NFL?"
This is ONE LIFE, one season, not several. There are no trades. You trade somebody mid-season and you've already lost. I don't know about you, but I want the Super Bowl celebration at the end.
Hold on to the love you have, cause no matter who you are with, there will be challenges and you will have frustrations. And being single is no better. You'll face just as much, only you'll be alone.
Understand what I'm telling you?
Follow the steps, Resolve this temporary mess, And get back to LIFE as the team you are meant to be.
Get your copy of the book HERE to see more on keeping it right on the day-to-day awesome that your love should and CAN be.
Don't forget to PLAY after you two make up with these delicious body treats
Step 1: Do NOT ask her to go to your place, and do NOT ask to go to hers.
That's immediate red flag for "this guy just wants sex." No matter how you try to spin it, women are not fooled by this. Any woman that is must be naive, or will wise up soon and you could pay for it later.
Step 2: Ask her to do something casual, like coffee or a drink.
The trick here is to relieve your pressure and hers by not asking it like it's "a date." Most women today date men they have some familiarity with beforehand, so if you don't know her incredibly well, start getting to know her.
If you work together, during a conversation, you could say "I'm going to lunch at ________. You wanna come along?"
If you have class together, you could say, "I"m going get a coffee. Can I get you one?" This works best if the coffee shop is on campus or within a short walking distance.
Step 3: What if she says no? Shrug it off.
Not every woman will say yes. And some women will say no initially, but then REGRET it later. Let a week pass, and make another similar effort.
You could say "Man you missed out last week, when I went to that new spot. I gotta get back out there today.) Then ASK HER AND SOMEONE ELSE TO JOIN YOU. This works exceptionally well if the other person you asked is ANOTHER WOMAN.
Why does this work? Because initially she thought you were asking her to lunch because you wanted "her." Now that you've asked someone else and you've been talking about how great the place was, you've made her wonder "Wait, why isn't this about me?" and "Maybe the place really is that good."
Once you've got her thinking both of these things, she'll more easily say yes.
As much as women hate to admit it, we like being WANTED. Any indication that we might not be wanted, piques our interest, at the beginning.
Because if we're not the center of your everything, we realize you're a strong and confident man who may be interested in us, but doesn't rely on us to keep his whole life together. That means you're a safe place to connect.
Now it's DATE time...
After you guys have lunch or coffee together, go for the date, and make it a REAL DATE, with dinner, a walk , or some other chance to show her a relaxing night out with a gentleman.
If she says no, once again, don't sweat it. She's not the only woman that'll be for you. Also, she may come around later. Just step back and chill, and give her a chance to show you some attention to get you back interested. If she doesn't, move on to someone else.
Want more tips on keeping it good? Click HERE or scroll up to the store tab.
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Author: Jessica Bordelon
Passionate, powerful, & gentle, she is an artist that captures the strength , power & energy of femininity in its purest form.